The Downhill Lie This is Carl Hiassen’s introduction. I am already well acquainted with the writing of Carl Hiassen through his Newberry Award-winning novel. My wife, a beautiful schoolteacher and more knowledgeable than me, is also familiar. Hoot.
As many middle-aged dreamers hope, reading about how to play golf might help me find that “onenness with golf universe” I am looking for. While browsing the local bookshop’s sports section, I came across this captivating chronicle by a man in his fifties who is returning to the game.
This question intrigued me. “What possesses a man to return in midlife to a game at which he’d never excelled in his prime, and which in fact had dealt him mostly failure, angst and exasperation?”It was like a connection. I found myself drawn inexorably to Carl Hiassen’s universe.
Why would I leave my well-stocked frig and climate-controlled man cave and go to a golf course with bugs infested hazards that increases my chances of having a stroke, heart attack or other serious health problems?
Hiassen’s writings made me feel again: The single most significant fact about golf, unfortunately, is that it’s as difficult as doing a digital prostatic exam.
The game was something I knew I could get better at when I returned to it. It was my desire to become a better player in middle-age than I was as a youngster.
Hiassen recounts the 577 days he spent in golf, beginning with buying clubs. “After some puzzled wandering I finally realized I had no idea which type of club I wanted to purchase.
I plan to get started cheaply. The goal is to reduce the cost of golf equipment and allow you to retreat if needed.
The reader is taken on an amusing ride as he returns to golf. He ends the trip with a tournament of 45 holes which he calls: “No lighthearted romp for a reclusive, neurotic, doubt-plagued duffer”It was. It was dismissed by his golfing partner. “A couple of bad nines, that’s all”Hiassen said it like this: “Don’t let an iceberg or two spoil the whole cruise.”
Hiassen sums up the appeal of golf with his entry for ‘day 577’, which he submitted after the tournament was over. Quinn watches him.
Today is bright and sunny, and it’s a beautiful march morning.
In a split second I am a little kid again. And I still remember the thrill of pounding one hard and then looking back to see my Dad’s reaction.
The biggest problem I have with The Downhill LieThe truth is, I have many better things but nothing as enjoyable as this book.